Embracing Change

For the majority of my life, I’ve stuck to strictly reading fiction. I detested reading anything preachy or labeled “self-help” and most of my college books, or as my family affectionately called them, my “hate the white man” books. I’ve been involved in countless small groups, and have barely skimmed through the required pages. People recommend non-fiction to me and I laugh and say, oh no, I only read fiction.

Except for some reason, this year, I’m on my 8th non-fiction book. 8th! And to be perfectly honest, I’m loving it. (Quick caveat:  of these books, Yes Please! by Amy Poehler, Bossypants by Tina Fey, Why Not Me by Mindy Kaling, and Still Foolin’ Em by Billy Crystal were not exactly a struggle, as they are hilarious and I listened to the audiobooks, read by the authors, on my commute. And, as they were written by comedians and comedy writers, there was probably quite a bit of embellishment to make them funnier.) Four of these books were straight up non-fiction and deal with some stuff that I struggle with: good/bad habits, saying yes, happiness, clutter, and weight.

I think the reason this year has been such a turning point in my reading life because there have been a lot of big changes in my life this year. Steven and I took our first real vacation since our honeymoon, I became an aunt, I lost my cousin, Steven graduated from grad school, I quit my job, we moved 400 miles back to the Sacramento area, Steven started his career and immediately jumped into tomato season, I was unemployed and questioning “what I wanted to do when I grew up,” I met some new friends, I started a new job… it’s only November, and this list is not exhaustive (I’ve left out two major changes as they aren’t mine to share). Overall it’s been a pretty good year for me, but I struggle with change. I’m not sure anyone really likes change, as humans are creatures of habit, but I think some people handle it better than others.

So it makes sense why I am drawn to such titles as Better than Before, The Happiness Project, Year of Yes, and Lose the Clutter, Lose the Weight. I’m struggling to make sense of the chaos and change and bring order and routine back into my life. I’m laboring to make good habits, overcome bad habits, clear out clutter, say yes to adventure, and bring about a more positive outlook on my life.

What are some bad habits that you are trying to break or good habits you are trying to adopt? What are some methods that have helped you embrace change? Also, I’m open to book recommendations. ;)

Attitude of Gratitude

I love November.

In college, November was usually the first time I would get to go home during the semester. For the last two years it’s meant driving 14+ hours during the nation’s most heavily traveled holiday weekend. It’s marked by cooler temps, changing leaves, rain, visits with family and friends, and thankfulness. While I love all of the aspects of this month (minus the long drive, which I finally don’t have to do this year, yay!), thankfulness and gratitude is the thing I’m really looking forward to as we enter this month.

October was hard this year. There has been some serious stress in my life in the last month, and at times, it’s been hard to be grateful about all of the good things in my life. The weird thing is, there are far more things in my life to be thankful for than stressed about. It just seems like the stressful things have more weight than the thankful things. Why is it that three big stressful things outweigh 100 things to be thankful for? Or maybe the better question is, why do we let the stressful things take up more space than the good things?

I have a friend on Facebook that posts “10 Great Things that Happened to Me Today/This Weekend/This Week”. I thoroughly enjoy reading these lists because they exude gratitude. A few weeks ago, in the midst of my crazy October, he posted his usual list of great things, followed by the same list from a different perspective. I read through the first list thinking, wow, these guys had a great vacation! I read through the second list thinking, wow, sounds like a miserable trip, everything seemed to go wrong! But the thing is, it was the exact same trip and the same events he was describing, but from a different perspective.

I tend to have the second perspective; Steven, thank goodness, has the first. His catch phrase is “Living the Dream.” When someone asks him “how’s it going?” he will almost always say “oh, living the dream!” The crazy thing to me is he says it honestly. I tried saying it once, it comes out sounding completely sarcastic. But I would love to be able to say it someday and sound sincere and genuine, because I do have a great life and I have so much to be thankful for.

So as November rolls along toward Thanksgiving, I’m going to adopt an attitude of gratitude and I challenge you to join me. I’m keeping a list of things that I am grateful for, not only to help me stop and be thankful for the good things, but to remind me in midst of intense stress of all the things I have to give thanks for. Feel free to let me know what you are thankful for this month in the comments.

Have a Grateful Month!